22 Jan Fri, 2010
It has been a while, since I last update. My blood indicators for my my liver and blood are haywire. It has deteriorated for last 2 months, since I stopped the chemo drugs. The turmor marker has jumped to 1300+. I spoke with the the oncologist to let me try another chemo drug. He reletented and will see me in 2 weeks time.
On my last blood test, my potassium level was too high and I was admitted into SGH for 1 night to normalise the potassium on 20 Jan 2010. Luckily, it is only 1 day stay.
Although externarlly, I am still okay, but internally, things seems not progressing well. I can only pray very hard to my religion to give me the strength and energy. Everyday is a bonus to me and I have to to treasure it it. Tomorrow is my twins' birthday and I am glad that I am around to celebrate with them and hope them that there will be more years that I can do so.
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Sunday, December 27, 2009
Home nurse visit today
28 December 2009, Monday
The Home Care nurse will visit today. Will have tonnes of questions to ask them on how to manage my fluid bag and some pain management stuff, but mostly more on the operational aspect for the water bag. Still have not figure out exactly what is the correct procedure for cleaning.
Initially, we have been thinking that the fluid in my body is subsiding, but Anthony thinks something is not right. So, I tried sitting up when changing for the water bag. Over the last 2 days, fluid flows out more, which means that I am not getting better as I thought I was. Sigh.
In better spirits over the weekend. Can pray more, which helps me to find solace. This helps a lot in me finding inner peace.
Get to sleep better at night too. Used to wake up, every 1 to 2 hour. Now, it improves. I can sleep through 3 to 4 hours per session during the night, before being disturbed for itchness and requires sponging.
Physically, I am still tired. Try not to sleep in the day too much, as it might affect my sleep at night. So, have to try to find something to do to keep myself awake.
Thanks for your encouraging words. I will still be a fighter to fight on. Need to continue to pursue the driving force that helps me to overcome this challenging period. Doc had predicted 3 to 6 months life span for me. I have exceeded it, and now into the 14 months. Must maintain the positive attitude and calmness in one's mind to conitnue fighting with the cancer cells, although the oncologist at this moment, has run out of medicine for me.
Please pardon me in my flow of thoughts. I am actually quite sleepy. So, may not have constructed the blog properly. But the gitz is still out there.
The Home Care nurse will visit today. Will have tonnes of questions to ask them on how to manage my fluid bag and some pain management stuff, but mostly more on the operational aspect for the water bag. Still have not figure out exactly what is the correct procedure for cleaning.
Initially, we have been thinking that the fluid in my body is subsiding, but Anthony thinks something is not right. So, I tried sitting up when changing for the water bag. Over the last 2 days, fluid flows out more, which means that I am not getting better as I thought I was. Sigh.
In better spirits over the weekend. Can pray more, which helps me to find solace. This helps a lot in me finding inner peace.
Get to sleep better at night too. Used to wake up, every 1 to 2 hour. Now, it improves. I can sleep through 3 to 4 hours per session during the night, before being disturbed for itchness and requires sponging.
Physically, I am still tired. Try not to sleep in the day too much, as it might affect my sleep at night. So, have to try to find something to do to keep myself awake.
Thanks for your encouraging words. I will still be a fighter to fight on. Need to continue to pursue the driving force that helps me to overcome this challenging period. Doc had predicted 3 to 6 months life span for me. I have exceeded it, and now into the 14 months. Must maintain the positive attitude and calmness in one's mind to conitnue fighting with the cancer cells, although the oncologist at this moment, has run out of medicine for me.
Please pardon me in my flow of thoughts. I am actually quite sleepy. So, may not have constructed the blog properly. But the gitz is still out there.
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Not a good day
23 December, 2009 Wednesday
As the year approaches to the end, things are not turning rosy for me. Some of you might have known that I was admitted into SGH for a week, for high calcium level and sustained cough. Been drowsy because of the morphine and vomitted ocassionaly. Pardon me for my wrong spelling too!
Had a course of 5 days treatment of radio theraphy. Today is day 4. Seems to work better on the pain and I don't need so much of the morphine.
Went to see Dr Toh yestersday. The results are not so good. No more chemo drugs for me for the time being until my next visit 3 weeks later. Hopefully, the TCM doc can do some magic about it, since it is going to play the lead role now. Have been stopping TCM med since hospital stay. Don't want to complicate the medication.
Morale a a bit low now. Can't do much prayer/chanting as I used to do it 3 to 4 hours, as the chanting is my morale booaster.
I must say big THANK YOU to my eldest sister. She helps me a lot during this period and sleep as little as me.
As the year approaches to the end, things are not turning rosy for me. Some of you might have known that I was admitted into SGH for a week, for high calcium level and sustained cough. Been drowsy because of the morphine and vomitted ocassionaly. Pardon me for my wrong spelling too!
Had a course of 5 days treatment of radio theraphy. Today is day 4. Seems to work better on the pain and I don't need so much of the morphine.
Went to see Dr Toh yestersday. The results are not so good. No more chemo drugs for me for the time being until my next visit 3 weeks later. Hopefully, the TCM doc can do some magic about it, since it is going to play the lead role now. Have been stopping TCM med since hospital stay. Don't want to complicate the medication.
Morale a a bit low now. Can't do much prayer/chanting as I used to do it 3 to 4 hours, as the chanting is my morale booaster.
I must say big THANK YOU to my eldest sister. She helps me a lot during this period and sleep as little as me.
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Test results
11 November, 2009 Wednesday
Everytime before the visit to the oncologist, I will go to NCC 1 or 2 days earlier for blood test and Dr Toh will review the blood test results with me during consultation. The feeling is always like a primary school girl, earnestly waiting for her test results.
The tumor marker has jumped to 284, as expected since I was off the chemo drugs for 2 weeks. So, Dr Toh told me to resume my regime. I told him about my chest seizure and chest pain. Had a X-ray done, but nothing shows up. Well, not sure whether this is good thing or not, but I still do not have answer to explain where I am having chest pain for almost 2 months.
Since the discharge from the hospital stay, my appetite deteriorates, especially during dinner time. Tend to get nausea feeling in the midst of dinner, despite I have taken anti-vomnit medicine. Also, I go to the toilet more frequently for big business. Not daihorrea, but usually in small quantity and it irritates me that I have to wash the wound each time I do big business. Now, I don't even dare to pass wind as I am not sure what would be the output. (Sori, a bit gross to discuss this here. Hope you won't puke out your food)
I am going to Japan again on 21 Nov for my 2nd pilgrimage, bringing my gal along. I was thinking very hard if I should go for H1N1 vaccination jap. No doctor can answer my questions, as this is a new drug and there is not enough information on the possible side effects or consequences to cancer patients who are still on treatment. Really troubled. Don't know what to do.
NCC has finally caught up that I stayed in the private ward (4 bedder) for all my hospital stays, so now I am being classified as non-subsidised patient. The savings foregone will be gst on the invoices, 50% on lab test and higher consultancy fees. I asked the doctor what can be done. He said I would need to see a medical social worker. I think forget about about it, since there is not much savings in the first place and the heavy costs are the chemo drugs and counter drugs which are not subsidised anyway. So friends, one day I may raise a fund raising exercise to fund my treatment, since I will be on half pay from next month onwards. Ha! Ha!
Everytime before the visit to the oncologist, I will go to NCC 1 or 2 days earlier for blood test and Dr Toh will review the blood test results with me during consultation. The feeling is always like a primary school girl, earnestly waiting for her test results.
The tumor marker has jumped to 284, as expected since I was off the chemo drugs for 2 weeks. So, Dr Toh told me to resume my regime. I told him about my chest seizure and chest pain. Had a X-ray done, but nothing shows up. Well, not sure whether this is good thing or not, but I still do not have answer to explain where I am having chest pain for almost 2 months.
Since the discharge from the hospital stay, my appetite deteriorates, especially during dinner time. Tend to get nausea feeling in the midst of dinner, despite I have taken anti-vomnit medicine. Also, I go to the toilet more frequently for big business. Not daihorrea, but usually in small quantity and it irritates me that I have to wash the wound each time I do big business. Now, I don't even dare to pass wind as I am not sure what would be the output. (Sori, a bit gross to discuss this here. Hope you won't puke out your food)
I am going to Japan again on 21 Nov for my 2nd pilgrimage, bringing my gal along. I was thinking very hard if I should go for H1N1 vaccination jap. No doctor can answer my questions, as this is a new drug and there is not enough information on the possible side effects or consequences to cancer patients who are still on treatment. Really troubled. Don't know what to do.
NCC has finally caught up that I stayed in the private ward (4 bedder) for all my hospital stays, so now I am being classified as non-subsidised patient. The savings foregone will be gst on the invoices, 50% on lab test and higher consultancy fees. I asked the doctor what can be done. He said I would need to see a medical social worker. I think forget about about it, since there is not much savings in the first place and the heavy costs are the chemo drugs and counter drugs which are not subsidised anyway. So friends, one day I may raise a fund raising exercise to fund my treatment, since I will be on half pay from next month onwards. Ha! Ha!
Sunday, November 1, 2009
"Hotel stay"
1 November 2009, Sunday
I was just discharged from SGH today. Was admitted on Wednesday when I had appointment to see my surgeon and he told me that I need to go under the table again for the same problem. He gave me some medical jargon "FIA" which I have no time to research. He said that if I don't it earlier, the infection would get worse. After having the previous experience, I agreed on the spot.
I have been having discharge from the wound since my last hospital stay in late Aug. In mid October, the infection flare up and I went to see GP. It only solved the problem temporarily for about 1 week and the infection flare up again. The night before, there was even blood discharge. So, no choice, had to do another surgery again. The surgeon said that this problem is quite common. So pray hard that if you have a pus, don't have it next to anus. It has a lot of after "operation" problem.
My mother-in-law calls my hospital stay as hotel stay. Not very pleasant to spend birthday in the hospital. Also, in the midnight of Friday, I was running a fever. The nurse only gave me sponge and cold pack and never gave me panadol that I asked for. Only after the doctors' visit and I told him about it, then I get my panadol. . My eldest sister was very nice. She was almost approaching her workplace and then u-turn back to come to the hospital to accompany me, after hearing that I tear on the phone. The pain was unbearable in the morning at first, with heavy head and fever and nurses not attending to your request plus late breakfast. Everything just seems not right. I only felt more comfortable to see my sister and she bought fish porridge for me for lunch. The hospital food was really lousy that day too! A few friends wanted to visit me and I had to sms to cancel it. Really in super lousy mood.Was drowsy on almost the whole day of Friday and only recover in the night. My hubby visisted at night after work and came with a fruit cake from Bengawan to celebrate my birthday. This brings little cheers to me, coupled with the flowers that I received from my relatives and the fruit basket from the office.
The wound is still quite raw now. I have to monitot it closely. If there is a lot of discharge or blood from the wound or fever returns, I will need to go back to SGH again. Fingers crossed.
One good news that I almost forgot. My tumour marker has dropped to record low of 142! Protein level has also inched up after I pumped protein powder daily. But because of the surgery, the oncologist asked me to stay off from my chemo drugs for 2 weeks. I really hope that the tumour marker will not jump up 200 points like the last time. Will pray very hard for it.
I was just discharged from SGH today. Was admitted on Wednesday when I had appointment to see my surgeon and he told me that I need to go under the table again for the same problem. He gave me some medical jargon "FIA" which I have no time to research. He said that if I don't it earlier, the infection would get worse. After having the previous experience, I agreed on the spot.
I have been having discharge from the wound since my last hospital stay in late Aug. In mid October, the infection flare up and I went to see GP. It only solved the problem temporarily for about 1 week and the infection flare up again. The night before, there was even blood discharge. So, no choice, had to do another surgery again. The surgeon said that this problem is quite common. So pray hard that if you have a pus, don't have it next to anus. It has a lot of after "operation" problem.
My mother-in-law calls my hospital stay as hotel stay. Not very pleasant to spend birthday in the hospital. Also, in the midnight of Friday, I was running a fever. The nurse only gave me sponge and cold pack and never gave me panadol that I asked for. Only after the doctors' visit and I told him about it, then I get my panadol. . My eldest sister was very nice. She was almost approaching her workplace and then u-turn back to come to the hospital to accompany me, after hearing that I tear on the phone. The pain was unbearable in the morning at first, with heavy head and fever and nurses not attending to your request plus late breakfast. Everything just seems not right. I only felt more comfortable to see my sister and she bought fish porridge for me for lunch. The hospital food was really lousy that day too! A few friends wanted to visit me and I had to sms to cancel it. Really in super lousy mood.Was drowsy on almost the whole day of Friday and only recover in the night. My hubby visisted at night after work and came with a fruit cake from Bengawan to celebrate my birthday. This brings little cheers to me, coupled with the flowers that I received from my relatives and the fruit basket from the office.
The wound is still quite raw now. I have to monitot it closely. If there is a lot of discharge or blood from the wound or fever returns, I will need to go back to SGH again. Fingers crossed.
One good news that I almost forgot. My tumour marker has dropped to record low of 142! Protein level has also inched up after I pumped protein powder daily. But because of the surgery, the oncologist asked me to stay off from my chemo drugs for 2 weeks. I really hope that the tumour marker will not jump up 200 points like the last time. Will pray very hard for it.
Sunday, October 18, 2009
I make it!
18 October 2009, Sunday
Yes, officially I cross the 1 year mark! A big pat on my shoulder. Clapping sounds and champagnes popping. :-)
Well, the past few days were also not that smooth sailing. Mywound on my butt got infected again and went to see a GP. He gave me antibiotics, antiseptic wash and cream. Luckily the medicine works. Otherwise, I would have to go back to SGH and get the surgeon to cut the wound and clean the infection.
Recently, I have been getting chest pain almost everyday and there is a particular spot on the chest that if I press, it will be painful. My last ECG and chest X-ray taken about 2-3 weeks ago showed normal. So, I also don't know what happen. Probably when the pain becomes so intense and I am perspiring, then I will check myself into A&E. The last time when I went to the walk-in clinic for the chest problem. I actually prepare a bag of toiletries, in case I was being admitted.
There has been some improvement in the bowel business. I have weaned myself off lactus (it's a medicine to soften the stool) and so far, except for 1 day no business, my bowel department has been working well. Swelling stomach has also improved. Goes to the toilet a little more frequent and with better flow. So, stomach has reduced swelling by a bit, and so is my weight. Within a week, my weight has dropped almost 3 kg. I hope this is all due to the water, but my stomach is still quite big.
I will continue to work hard and looking forward to the 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th ...............anniversary!
Yes, officially I cross the 1 year mark! A big pat on my shoulder. Clapping sounds and champagnes popping. :-)
Well, the past few days were also not that smooth sailing. Mywound on my butt got infected again and went to see a GP. He gave me antibiotics, antiseptic wash and cream. Luckily the medicine works. Otherwise, I would have to go back to SGH and get the surgeon to cut the wound and clean the infection.
Recently, I have been getting chest pain almost everyday and there is a particular spot on the chest that if I press, it will be painful. My last ECG and chest X-ray taken about 2-3 weeks ago showed normal. So, I also don't know what happen. Probably when the pain becomes so intense and I am perspiring, then I will check myself into A&E. The last time when I went to the walk-in clinic for the chest problem. I actually prepare a bag of toiletries, in case I was being admitted.
There has been some improvement in the bowel business. I have weaned myself off lactus (it's a medicine to soften the stool) and so far, except for 1 day no business, my bowel department has been working well. Swelling stomach has also improved. Goes to the toilet a little more frequent and with better flow. So, stomach has reduced swelling by a bit, and so is my weight. Within a week, my weight has dropped almost 3 kg. I hope this is all due to the water, but my stomach is still quite big.
I will continue to work hard and looking forward to the 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th ...............anniversary!
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